Sheree 0:00
Welcome back to another episode of The Wild and wild collective. Today we are diving into a topic that's really near and dear to both Christianize hearts. It's something that you may not expect to hear on a wellness podcast. But we are here to really help you uplevel on a mind, body and soul space. So when it comes to doing the deeper work, yes, we want to be healing the physical body, but a huge part of the healing. And a huge reason why people can't make deeper changes on that physical level is because we're not looking at our mind, we're not looking at the stories that we're telling ourselves every single day, we're not looking at our belief system. And so what we really want to do is bring some awareness to what is it that you might be doing every single day unconsciously, that's actually holding you back on achieving those big goals and living that big life? Krista, what do you find super common in your space, your practice where, you know, people are hitting against a brick wall, I suppose time and time again, that are really limiting themselves. Yeah, I
Christa 1:05
mean, I think that just as human beings, we, our brains, the way our brains work is that we, we create these neural pathways, and it helps us to drive a car with ease, it helps us to do routine with ease, right. But it can also I think, what we don't recognize is create a certain way of viewing life in general, what you're worthy of what you're not worthy of what group of people that you associate with are things that you can't break into what kind of body health that you can have, or you resigned to the fact that no, I'm just unhealthy, or my genetic say this. So I think that it all goes hand in hand. And it's kind of a natural way that our brain works so that we're not overwhelmed. But it doesn't always work in our favor. Because if we look around and we feel like you want to achieve or be or become something different. Then therein lies some friction, some friction about where you are and where you want to be right 100%.
Sheree 2:00
And I think sometimes it can even be down to Are we worthy of being taken care of? Do I love myself enough to actually choose the healthy whole foods and nourish my body? And this might be happening on an unconscious level? Like, I just want to reiterate that because a lot of the times when I know you and I both do this work with clients, they're coming to you and they feel like they've tried everything it's like, I always come back to that saying like, why do we do what we do when we know what we know, it's because of these program beliefs. It's because of these unconscious beliefs that are living deep inside of us. And you know, Dr. Joe Dispenza talks about this all the time, but the neurons that fire together, wire together. And so essentially what that means is that the more we repeat, a behavior, a belief, a thought in our head, the more we tell ourselves those same stories, consciously or unconsciously, we're going to really strengthen those neural patterns, which means it becomes more and more ingrained in our lives. And so what we have to start to do, and this is the beauty of doing some of the inner work is that's a wire, some of those neurons re wire in a healthier way in a way that really serves and supports you, you know, a number to share an example, with one of my clients recently, when we got to the root of what was really going on, there was this deep, underlying, feeling that she wasn't enough. And as a result of that she wasn't worth taking care of. She was more than happy to make sure she was taking care of everyone else she would cook for everyone else, she would do the beautiful meals for everyone else. And then it was like, well, I'll just have the leftovers. I'll just have the scraps I'll just Oh, whatever. I'll just choose to go and have something quick and easy, right. And I think a lot of mothers do this. I think a lot of people who live busy lives who are busy taking care of everyone else, if you've got that ingrained people pleaser side that comes in, right. And so when we can identify that within ourselves, start to reprogram our self worth from the root, you are going to start choosing you more and more and realize that you are worth taking care of and it's not from a selfish place. Because we know that the better we take care of ourselves, the better we can take care of other people.
Christa 4:19
Yeah, I think that for one thing, we kind of put ourselves in these invisible cages, I like to call them because we think that we're trapped by something we think that we are trapped by, you know, not being healthy or needing to lose weight or in relationships, or we're stuck in our business or the particular job we're in but we're not I mean, these are just invisible cages that you can you're free to shift and change and do but we convince ourselves of these things because we aren't aware for one thing. I mean, just like you said, unawareness is kind of what's driving this, I think and so I'm hoping that in this conversation you When I pop in and think, Okay, what am I unaware of, and sometimes and the people listening, but sometimes it requires kind of surrounding yourself with people who are committed to growth, whether that's in their health in their mentality in general in their goals, because I'm being open to feedback. So if you surround yourself with people who are growth minded, and you're also open to feedback, and you're accepting of the fact that people can see what you can't see about your life, or how you're holding yourself back, I think sometimes it is difficult to see where what is truth and what is not truth, because you just believe what you believe. And you've always believe that and those sources come from maybe your parents, your upbringing, the groups of friends, some kind of, you know, some happening that happened to you, and you glommed on to this particular belief about this area of your life. And to undo that is a challenge, I think, for people and for everybody. I don't think that I know that I know that it's a challenge to kind of unwind, and then start to believe that something different is possible for you. That's kind of the challenge. How do you see that? I mean, how have you taken an example and kind of explored yourself? And were, you know, kind of explored being aware of something new?
Sheree 6:16
Yeah, I mean, I guess personal developments are really a journey, right? And the more you become aware you, the more you start to notice your thoughts. And one of the biggest things that, you know, I try to help clients and help people become aware of is, like, you say, are they living in that growth mindset? Are they actually living in the victim mindset? And sometimes that's the first step is to bring awareness, and it's not from this negative place, but you looking at life as okay, this is happening to me, or are we changing? Are we able to change our perception of our reality to this is happening for me? And, you know, I know both of us have heard this term so many times, but our triggers are our treasures. And so if you get triggered, what is that teaching you? And to give you like a real life example, something I've noticed, and I'm happy to share quite vulnerably, you know, with my history of an eating disorder, I used to binge a lot. And then I would purge, because hey, that's how you manage to stay skinny. That was it. That was my thinking around it. And what I have noticed recently, and it's I'm very pleased that I got that level of awareness when I'm doing this, but I have been reaching for snacks, way more after dinner. I have been like, so aware that I'm doing it and like I'm full, like, I'm comfortably full. I have eaten enough protein. My meal was amazing. So nourishing my body. The whole day has been great, right? I haven't had anything you know, that I didn't want to eat, I may have had a treat food somewhere in there. If I wanted to, like I'm very good with intuitive eating. Yet. At the end of the day. I'm like, Oh, well, can I have something else? And when I got really curious about this, and this is what I find with a lot of my like, a lot of my clients is there's something deeper missing. And so I always like to ask the question, okay, well, what is it that you really want in that moment, and I took the moment to pause again, if you think about this as a trigger, the trigger was okay, I'm overeating or eating something that doesn't serve me. I'm reaching for something sugary. And mine was like, I actually need a hug. I'm feeling quite alone right now. You know, I've gone through such a massive shift in these past 910 months. And it's very different for me to navigate. Like I was in a relationship for six, almost six years straight. And so not having that person not having that kind of comfort to come home to ya got flatmates. Yeah, I'm living with amazing people. But I was then turning to food. And it went back into that kind of default setting, which is why we have to continue to reprogram and rewire those neural pathways, and no amount of affirmations is going to do that, like they have the place. They're amazing. They're what we typically get people to, once we've done that deeper work to see what's beneath all of it. But yeah, I hope that helps shed some light on kind of like, a real yeah,
Christa 9:09
thanks for sharing that. I think a lot of people can relate to that. And you know, why am I eat so much, and I'm not even hungry. And food does change our brain chemistry. And oftentimes, it's not the food that we actually want. It's enjoyable, but what we're really after the feeling same with drinking alcohol, sometimes it's not, it's not the taste of the alcohol that you're craving, necessarily. It's the feeling that the alcohol gives you that you're craving. I think my point of self awareness or something that kind of stands out to me is, you know, oftentimes I'll feel like, oh, this next level in my business or whatever navigating my next level, I'll often think, who do I need to talk to? Or who do I need to call or who do I need to hire to help me achieve this? And although you know, we are creatures of you know, we need to have we don't need to do things alone. I think I would always go to that versus Wait a minute. That's just how I've always done things but What do I already know? What's already available to me? Why is there a distrust in my own just being quiet with myself and navigating some of these pieces of this next level without needing to hire or call or, you know, not trust myself, I have to require information from other people. So I think that's my been some of my point of awareness around just what's my pattern, and doesn't really serve me at all times, right. And patterns can be difficult number one, because we can't see them all the time. But number two, because we can say, let's change this now, I will do good for a week or two, and then we're right back to square one without even knowing it, because it's such an ingrained pattern. So what have you done? What do you do for if you know that you want to change a habit? What are the ways and the things that you do to kind of uplevel and not go back to the old ways, was
Sheree 10:50
just like what we do with people from a holistic or functional medicine perspective, right? Like you get to the root. And that can be painful, that can be tough, that can bring up emotions that maybe we've been avoiding, or we don't want to look at, or maybe we didn't even know, we're there. Like you mentioned before, our conditioning happens from the ages of zero to seven. And so a lot of the beliefs that we're walking around with, aren't even ours, really, we've kind of tried them on or something happened to us when we were younger. And it's tricky at that. And so, my approach is always to get to the root cause of it. And I'll use some of the tools, one of the, one of the tools I'm really leaning into at the moment is actually breathwork, which you don't have, you don't even have to know the story. It's a somatic form of healing, a somatic form of therapy. And you don't have to know the story. You don't even have to know the belief but you to release it, which I think is amazing that we have that ability. And I know we've done a whole podcast episode on breath work, but I think that that's really, really powerful tool to be able to utilize. The other one that I love is the mindset work, you know, Byron, Katie's? One of the things that I will walk around with, and I'll even find myself if I'm driving or something I've noticed recently is the assumptions that I've been making about things or if someone hasn't replied, or if I've seen someone, and like, maybe they haven't waved back or whatever. And like, you get all of this angst like in your body. And then going, actually, you know what, and her first question is, you find the belief and you go, is it true? And you like, I then asked myself, well, no, like, I can't know 100% With 100% certainty that that person has chosen to say, ignore me, right? I can't know, with 100% certainty that I've upset some person. And maybe that's why they're not replying. Like, we look at this from like, a friendship perspective or something. Right? And so I will always try that on. And like, Oh, is it true? Okay, well, I can't not I need to give them or I need to give the situation, whatever it is the benefit of the doubt. And then I start to work myself through that process that that she does, and I think that's quite powerful.
Christa 13:14
Yeah, I mean, you're telling yourself a story anyway. So why not tell yourself a different story? Because in the present moment, you're just making up the story. So one thing that, you know, I'm currently reading 10x is easier than 2x. And when you read the title, you're like, What the hell are they talking about, like how it's taxing and amount of money that you're making each month, or amount of physical shifts or relationships or amount of travel, whatever, whatever you want to 10x? How is that easier than to x. And what I love about this is that it really drives home the point that I'm just gonna use money, because everybody can relate to this. In order to say, instead of making $1,000 a month, I'm going to make $10,000 a month, but we get caught up in where it gets difficult to say, I'm going to bring in 1000 to 2000, right like that, sometimes can be like, Oh, I just need to work more, I need to bring in more of whatever I'm doing to create money, I need to make more of the product, or I need to present more of the service or I need to work more hours. And that can feel daunting, if you are telling yourself, I'm going to jump to 10,000 a month, you have to and maybe I need to be working with bigger numbers here. But the point is, you know that you have to do something drastically different than what you're doing to 10x something. So if we want to use like a health health example, if you say I want to, you know, maybe you have 50 pounds to lose technically, but you say I want to lose 10 pounds, you know, that looks different than if you say I want to lose 50 pounds, you're gonna have to hire different trainers do different things. You have a higher commitment level, eat different foods, educate yourself differently. So it gets you out of that kind of squiggly changing and you start to explore whatever I actually capable of combat actually holding myself back. And that's a new degree of awareness, I think about where you are, what you're actually capable of, and where's your level of creativity to actually get there. And even if you don't hit the 10x, you are far beyond the 2x, because of the new habits that you have decided and learned about and opened your, your possibilities to. So that's another practice too, that I've started to use is like, really shoot for the moon with things because what does that quote, shoot for the moon, but you'll even if you don't hit the moon, you'll end up with a summons. So it's still you're still gonna go far beyond but it takes a moment, I think in any area of your life that you're wanting to shift, to be more realistic with yourself and challenge yourself beyond what you think, you know, have a goal and then tell yourself, I'm going to double that, or I'm going to triple that. And then how does, how does that trigger? The way of thinking about yourself? And what does it require of you to reach that.
Sheree 15:55
And I think there's a, there's a beautiful message in that and being willing to stop playing small. And I think a lot of us operate from a place of safety. And that comes from a space of survival instinct. And there's nothing wrong with that. But if we've been conditioned for years to believe that, you know, maybe your family, maybe it'd be triggering for members of your family or your friendship circle, if you did start to earn massive income, maybe it will be triggering for your family or friends, if you did start to lose weight, I had a client share with me the other day that she was like, I actually know I hold on to the weight. And I don't even make it a priority. Because people who've been expecting more of me if they see me, and they're like, Oh, she's an overweight person. So this is the story. She's telling herself, right? That necessarily a truth that if they see me, I'm an overweight person, then they're going to have lower expectations. And if I was to suddenly lean up, tone up, get stronger in the way that I wanted to, suddenly, people would expect more of me. And there's something scary about that for her. Right. And so I think it's giving ourselves that permission to shoot for the moon, like you said, to smash through the glass ceilings. But with that you are going to encounter triggers, you are going to come up against all of these tests, trials and tribulations that maybe you wouldn't even see coming, because you are now trying to operate at a level that maybe no one else in your family history ever has, or the people in your circle have. And that's what's something you brought up earlier that I thought was beautiful. Chris was like, surround yourself with community, surround yourself with people who are in a growth mindset. If you're wanting to achieve something that no one around you has ever done before. You need to step into different rooms. It's like that old saying like, if you're the smartest person in the room, you're in the wrong frickin room. Like get yourself into rooms that make you feel uncomfortable. We're all high achievers here, and we're striving for that next level. But if you're the one that's at the top of the pecking order, you're not going to be learning anything new, you're not going to be challenging yourself. And you're not going to be reaching new levels of growth. Yeah, I
Christa 18:10
mean, up leveling, shifting, changing habits, all those things are actually scary. And I think that it comes down to you sometimes making a list of what you actually want. Because if we rely on what we need, we can make all sorts of excuses. I mean, really, all we need is like clothing and shelter and food and oxygen, maybe a friend or two, right? So we can always convince ourselves like, well, I don't really need to really up level in this direction or that direction, don't really need to, I kind of fit in all of my clothes. My numbers are kind of okay, on lab work. I'm making enough money to cover the bills. But what do you actually want, and you explore it. And you're very, very clear. And you're really honest with yourself that what you want might offend some people it might go against, you know, you might lose friends, because you're no longer drinking, you might lose friends, because all of a sudden, they think, Oh, you think you're too good because you lost weight. You know, I'm just using examples. But those are some of the unconscious thoughts that come in our mind. I want to lose this weight, or I want to stop drinking, or I want to make more money can ruffle people's feathers around you. And that can be really scary. Therefore we just stop ourselves, even though we're frustrated with where we are. And we don't even see it. We're just like, Oh, I'm such a loser. Why can't I ever reach my goal? We have to start exploring what is the underlying fear? What is the underlying verbiage that you're saying to yourself that's keeping you there. So I think the hard part then is really taking time and identifying what you actually want. And then from there, being willing to let go, be as creative as possible. Go do the thing. Create the thing, hire the people do what it takes to get what you actually want and that can be scary. But oftentimes that's the solution to your own frustration.
Sheree 20:00
sense it's, I mean, talk about this with ice baths. We talked about this with sauna as we talk about this with any kind of biohacking that you might do any kind of change, you need to get comfortable in the uncomfortable. Because it's showing up doing the exact same things, you're gonna get the same result that is literally the definition of insanity. Right. And so I really love that you that you shared that because so often we just trap ourselves, like you saying those invisible cages. And it's about questioning those fears. It's about questioning those beliefs and really choosing you at the end of the day, because when you start to shine your light, when you start to shine your light bright, you are going to trigger others of events and opportunity for them to heal as well. You know, you are doing this work, you are leading the way and chances are like we've said, no one no one around you is potentially done that before, which is why it can feel even harder. So take that next step. Be comfortable in the uncomfortable.
Christa 20:57
Yeah, that brings up I actually earlier today it was just having a meet up with a coach around public speaking. And she her question to me was okay, so when do you want to do your first big talk? When is that because we need to prepare? And I thought I told her this. I said, you know, when you asked me that it's as if you're asking me when do you want to set the date that we're going to take up the plane and jump out and parachute down and skydive, you know it kind of gives you that same like, we don't have to do this, right? Like we didn't have to do this. But because it scares me a little bit. And it feels really uncomfortable to speak in front of a larger group and to spread my purpose and my my message, I know I'm on the right track, right? Because if it's possible, and it scares me, and it's in alignment with what I know that I need to be doing, then I have to push myself to do that. So these different levels are not comfortable. They're not comfortable. For me. I mean, constantly putting ourselves kind of out there doing new things, it can be really challenging mentally. But I think on the other side of that is where we really want to be. And so it's worth going through. And oftentimes when we're actually going through it, it's not as bad as the story that we're telling ourselves of what it's going to take right just take it day by day take these health challenges, these health changes are new levels day by day, and it doesn't feel as overwhelming that way.
Sheree 22:18
Yeah, and I guess just to close out to really share something that I think is really helpful that you just touched on, is we can again, coming back to changing that perception, our body sent the same chemical and physical reactions, whether we're nervous or excited. And so we can look at it through a different lens. And and this is what athletes do. Right? Right before a big event. And they studied athletes in this space and think Will Smith talks about this a lot. But changing that energy from nervousness to excitement, your body's chemistry is already doing it, you can just change the story about it. So with your public speaking, it's like well, I know this is a growth edge. And I'm actually yeah, there's some nervousness. But I get to be excited about being on the edge of this. Yeah.
Christa 23:05
Yeah. Amazing. I hope that that our vulnerability and our stories, helps you listeners to also take the next step because any change is not easy. Habit, a change, next level change. None of it is but I think first step is always awareness. And then it's what am I going to do with that awareness now, being really brutally honest with yourself of what you want, and attempting to think about what is my 10 acts of this version, and going from there to kind of map out your road
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